Girls are Mad !! The crazy Ex?

Hope you have all had a great christmas and have a prosperous new year to come….So..speaking of christmas, after the festivities of the day and the long slog of what seemed to be a thousand mile round trip to drop the rellies off home, i ventured around to my uncle’s house gathering. It’s always a good crack around his house and he never fails to amaze me with his escapades and stories when it comes to his ” new conquests” in women and how he thought they were alright and then suddenly they flipped the switch on him and ended up being mad or like glen close’s character in Fatal Attraction.

Speaking to and knowing my uncle as i do ( he’s 43 going on 18 and likes to think of himself as the person Hugh Heffner modelled himself on ) has brought me to write todays post. The title is a well used saying from him and from most male friends i have, and, to be honest, if i was a woman who became involved in a relationship with my uncle, i too would want to chop his cock off and throw it into the tall long grass never to be seen again…He should have a warning sticker stuck to his head for all women to keep away from. I love him to bits and for the most part he is a good man, but relationship wise he is a complete headfuck!..every woman’s nightmare!

I’ve decided that I’m going to attempt to delve deeper into this little quip favoured by the majority of men and completely blow my uncle’s view out of the water! I’m not saying that every now and again we have people cross our path who genuinely reveal themselves to be something resembling a fatal attraction, however, it begs the question, how does the sane partner become the crazy ex?

Allow me to divulge the conversation between me and my uncle, in order to set the scene:

Me: So, how’s things going with the love life, have you met anyone or decided to settle down yet”?

Uncle: “nah, not me, i did meet someone for a little while but she was mad and i had to get rid”!

Me : ” Mad? How was she mad, what was she doing”?

Uncle : ” she kept turning up at my house at all hours of the night, wouldn’t stop ringing me, turned up at the places i was out at with friends, the woman stalked me, she was crazy”!

Me: ” Now, hold on, was she REALLY mad, or did you make her mad?, I’ve seen how you go on with these women, flirting with others in front of them, ignoring calls, answering your phone to them when you have female friends in the house and making out your having some sort of orgy or going on all shady about the female voices they can hear, I actually reckon they aint mad, its you who turns them mad”!

At which point my uncle starts grinning and says ” yeah i do all that but that still doesn’t take away the fact that women are generally crazy and can’t just relax and chill with things”!

This conversation then brings on a whole debate about the differences between men and women etc etc etc blah blah blah and so on……….

Guys, women are NOT all crazy, let me flip the script! If your woman was doing everything that my uncle was doing…would you not get angry, start thinking things were going on ( even if they weren’t) and be trying to catch her out in the act ? Of course you would!…if you gave enough of a shit about her!

When me and my last ex split a few months ago, I’m under no illusion that to his friends and colleagues I will be known as the crazy ex ! My ex wasn’t a serial cheater and playa like my uncle, however, he WAS a serial headfuck ! I was so engulfed and wrapped up in his whole being that i was completely at his beck and call…….for a short period!!! There is no disputing that he cared deeply for me and wanted to be with me, it was just on his terms. His characteristics and mindset, being a complete control freak and very slyly and subconsciously reducing me to think i was thick and nothing but a trophy on his arm made him a complete wanker and materialistic fuckwit ( can you tell I’m still bitter )!

This man hated being questioned or disagreed with and if i pulled him up on his bullshit or tried to talk about an issue that we had such as…………….. him making false promises, saying things because he thought that was what I wanted to hear instead of telling me the truth and being upfront, conveniently being uncontactable on my birthday, disappearing when we had arranged to meet my friends and being too hung over to go out when we were to go anywhere i wanted to go. If I tried to talk about how these let downs made me feel he would ignore me to the extreme of not contacting me for days, weeks and at one point I never heard off him for 2 and 1/2 months!!!!!!!!! Yet, I was expected to do everything he wanted to do, meet all his friends and put myself out for him !

What kind of man at 36 years of age, a very successful bank manager does stuff like that and throws his teddy bear out of his pram because he can’t get his own way? Someone who is not stable emotionally that’s who! He is unable to deal with a relationship and is so lacking in confidence that he has to hide behind money and be an extreme control freak. without control he can’t cope!!! I reckon…if anyone is going to be labelled as a ” crazy ex” here, it sure as hell aint me! yet, I accept the fact that to him, I shall be the one who was mad as i dared to question him and rocked the boat ( I wouldn’t be controlled)!! I always argued the fact that at 36 years he had one serious relationship that lasted 2 years, at 33 I had one serious relationship that had lasted 11 years…..go figure!

So….I put it to you Men, Womanizers, Playas, Serial Cheats and Head Fucks alike…is your ex REALLY crazy or is it you and your actions who have sent them crazy? because at some point this woman was sane enough to date, get into a relationship with and invest time into. We all have those crazy ex’s..but…how crazy are they…really??? I’d put money on it that ( for the most part) it ain’t the crazy ex but the Crazy boyfriend and his carrying on!

Lets face it, men and women are wired differently and as a result we will never fully understand each other, however, there has to be compromise and respect for the other persons feelings, thoughts and desires when in a relationship.

Plus…HELL HATH NO FURY THAN A WOMAN SCOURNED…..just remember that next time you try to say we are crazy, that shit just might come back and bite you on your squeeky clean ass !!! 😉 mwahahahahahaha